Jessie At Home
r
E

Pure Terror

This post may contain affiliate links, which means I may receive a commission if you make a purchase using these links. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

I know this is a bit more then I usually share with you, and I don’t even know if I will publish this post.

Pure. Terror.

That is what I feel right now. I feel it about Doug’s job. I feel it about our finances. I feel it about our house. I feel it about everything on my to do list. I feel it about my parenting skills. Most of all, I feel it about what may happen after the next election, and I have never felt this way about politics before.

Maybe it is that I blame Chris Christie for most of our problems. He is on a mission to destroy teachers, and thanks to him, we may be a casualty. For several years, Doug has had a pay freeze, and every year he has to pay more into health insurance. As the cost of living goes up, our income goes down. We refused to let Christie win. We bet on Doug finally getting a contract, and getting the raises due to him, we were led to believe it would happen before this school year. Our bet is being called, and I’m not sure what is going to happen as the cards are turned. All we need is the contract to happen. If it is at least similar to what it has always been for the past 13 years that Doug has worked in Paterson, then we will be just fine. After 13 years, Doug will finally be making above the average teacher salary in NJ. For 13 years he has made less then the average.

We have been together for nearly a decade, and for nearly a decade, we have scrapped by, just waiting for this school year. The year when he would finally be making the kind of salary we could live on without stressing about bills. This year is here, but this year has not come. We are stalled. Christie is winning. I have seen what this man can do. I am terrified that he will still be our Governor next year, and I am terrified Romney will be out President. After seeing the damage Christie can do as Governor, I have nightmares about what Romney can do as President.

I am not a majorly political kind of gal. But the past 4 years of Christie has made me…well…terrified.

I don’t want to have to move again. This house may need a lot of work, but it can be what we need. We see what it will become, if we could just get a contract. But it is no longer about renovating the house. Now it is about keeping the house. One year. That’s all we have. If there is no contract by the end of this year, we will have to sell this house. I can’t do this again. We will find ourselves a nice 3 bedroom apartment or condo, and just stay there. Even if I have to sell most of my sewing machines and supplies. I’m not sure I can go through buying a house again.

I have such a hard time knowing I live in the USA, and yet this is acceptable treatment of teachers. Thirteen years. THIRTEEN YEARS. And we are not trying to live an elaborate life. We just want to keep our home in a decent school district for our children. We just want to make enough to pay our bills, and maybe let the girls take some dance classes, or whatever kind of classes they want. I don’t want to have to be the mom who has to ask the principal if there is aid for class trips, so my girls don’t have to miss out because we can’t pay to send them to the zoo. Thirteen years. I don’t think we are being unreasonable. But Christie does.

I have been through a lot in my life. I have always been able to work through. To climb out of the holes I always seem to end up in. With the exception of 11 years ago, I have never been as scared as I am right now. I will keep moving forward, keep fighting. I just don’t know if the bottom is about to fall out from under me.

“Bravery resides in the heart of everyone, and the time will come when it needs to be summoned.”

 

1 thought on “Pure Terror”

  1. Hey you! We are right there with you. George is having the same problem, no raises and put more out for health care. We are stressing too about the house and politics. (we are also thinking of starting a commune in Canada if the elections go bad, you can come 🙂 You are one of the strongest, most organized people I know and you are strong enough to get through this!

    You love your family and do so much with them and that is what is important. So keep your spirits high and we will all get through this somehow.

    Call if you need to rant!

    Reply

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Award - Top Blogger 2020 AFC

2019*2020*2021

CGOA Member Logo
Award Best Crochet Patterns 2018 I Like Crochet
Award - Crochet Blogger Award
award - I Like Crochet Designer
Award - best knitting patterns 2018 ILK
Award Top Blogger AFC 2018